The Halloween Fairy: Your New Best Friend

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We’d dressed our daughter up in the standard, adorable, ladybug costume, taken millions of photos, paraded her happily around the neighborhood, and felt so proud of ourselves every time she squeaked out the words “thank you” in her tiny little two-year-old voice. But, it was upon returning home with our little girl clutching her pumpkin bucket full of Halloween loot that the terror finally struck <play “Psycho” shower scene music here> –

WHAT WERE WE SUPPOSED TO DO

WITH ALL OF THIS CANDY???!!!  

I mean, just skimming the ingredients (when they were actually listed) on the backs of each wrapper is a nutritionist’s nightmare! It seemed we had two options:

  1. Let her eat the candy and feel tremendous amounts of guilt while our child ran around on a maniacal sugar high; or
  2. Throw it away and become the mean, strict parents who ruin every Halloween. For us, neither option would do.

That’s when she first appeared – The Halloween Fairy! I’ll bet you’ve never heard of this most wonderful, magical, sanity-saving creature, so let me tell you about her. (BTW, you have my permission to alter this story in any way you choose as you spread the word about this little-known yet extremely kind-hearted fairy.) You see, on Halloween Night, children go trick-or-treating and collect vast amounts of candy that we all know is impossible to consume in one night and is rather unhealthy for strong, intelligent, growing boys and girls. Meanwhile, the poor, little, magical creatures (such as elves, fairies, gnomes, sprites, etc.) are left with nothing! Ask any child under the age of 5, and he’ll tell you that that’s very unfair. So, the children enjoy _(insert # here) pieces of trick-or-treat candy on Halloween night and leave the rest of the candy outside for the Halloween Fairy to take to all of those afore mentioned poor, little, magical creatures. In exchange, the Halloween Fairy leaves various things such as toys and edible treats whose ingredients are far more pleasant to read. It’s a win-win situation!…IF you make sure that the Halloween Fairy disposes of the candy properly (i.e. the dumpster is far more forgiving than the gut and thighs.)

So, what happens when our children finally rebel and refuse to give up their candy to some mystical fairy that may or may not really exist? Like with Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny, we’ll deal with that hurdle when we get to it. But, after 9 years of visits from the Halloween Fairy now, I’m relieved to report that kids are more excited than ever to exchange their Halloween spoils. On Sunday morning, when they wake up to a new board game, a few handfuls of Sunspire SunDrops and 100 Chuck E. Cheese’s game tokens, they’ll forget all about their pumpkin buckets full of junk, and I’ll be promised a few hours of peaceful reading while streaming my favorite tunes at Chuck E. Cheese’s.

Coincidentally flu season starts with the Halloween candy gorge and ends with the Valentines Day gorge. All that sugar and all of those artificial chemicals reduce your immune and detoxification functions leaving you more susceptible to catching the viral and bacterial infections going around this time of year.

Please, share this post with someone you care about and leave us a comment below telling us how you manage to keep your family healthy and the kids satisfied.

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